Before our children are even born, we have dreams for them. We think of what they will be like as babies and the personalities they will develop as they grow. These dreams only get more real after they are born. Clara’s dad, Joe, says that as he sang to Clara as a baby, he imagined what it would be like to dance with her as a little girl and even watch her get ready for her prom. It is truly one of the joys of parenthood – imagining a blissful, happy future.
When today’s guests, Jenna and Joe, went to Jenna’s 28-week ultrasound, however, they got their first ‘kick in the gut’ that the blissful future they were imagining might not be possible. Baby Clara was suffering from SVT (supra ventricular tachycardia), and Jenna needed to be hospitalized immediately. They tried numerous medications, but little Clara entered into the world as a premature infant. Clara had numerous complications in her first 5 1/2 months of life, but eventually, they were able to bring her home, although still with a central line for her IV nutrition.
Despite all of these hurdles, Jenna describes this time at home as ‘amazing.’ They started to dream again, hoping that Clara would be able to lead a relatively full life. That all changed 5 1/2 months later (10 1/2 weeks before this interview was recorded when after a relatively routine medical procedure, Clara suddenly died on Mother’s Day – Jenna’s first Mother’s Day. Jenna had looked forward to this day for weeks, telling all her friends how happy she was that she wouldn’t be in the hospital as had been the case the year before when she was still pregnant with Clara, but the day had turned into a nightmare.
Their vibrant, happy amazing little girl was suddenly gone, and with her, all of the new little family’s dreams went with her. Now, Jenna and Joe are slowly trying to put together the pieces of their life once again. They are moving to be closer to family and trying to find grief support in any way they can. Now their biggest dream for their little smiling Clara is to make sure that they are not the only ones who remember her and let others know that Clara is still a part of their lives.
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