Dealing With The Loss of a Child
My Story

Inspiring Hope, One Day at a Time

As a pediatrician, married mom of three biological children and one foster son, my life was busy, rushing off to my office four days a week, seeing patients for three and working as a medical director of a local physician organization for one. I balanced this with rushing off to shuttle my kids to after sports and other after school activities. All of this changed one day in August of 2018 when my 14 year old son, Andy, was killed in a car accident. I felt like my life was over, and in some ways it was over, and a new life was forced to begin in its place. 

Grief is seldom discussed openly in our culture, and the death of a child makes people feel even more uncomfortable. On this blog and podcast, ‘Losing a Child: Always Andy’s Mom’, the topic is approached openly and honestly, speaking to people who have lost loved ones and experts who help care for them. Whether you are a parent experiencing loss or someone who wants to support another going through this tragedy, this blog and podcast strives to offer hope and help.

“Be still and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10

A Love for Music

My son, Andy, was extremely musically talented. Music really spoke to him. Once when he was 5 years old, we took him to a Trans-Siberian Orchestra concert. I looked to him at one point of the concert and he had tears freely flowing down his face. I quickly asked him what was wrong. His reply, ‘The music, it’s just so sad.’ 

He played the piano for many years and played his French Horn, that he named Frenchie, for three. His greatest instrument though, was his own voice. He was a head chorister for the Grand Rapids Choir of Men and Boys and sang with the choir for five years. This video is a clip of one of his final solos, fitting as he sings about ‘fitting ourselves for heaven.

Recent Blog

 

A New Bio

Monday evening, something happened that hit me hard, causing my grief to swell and overwhelm me once again. A simple, ordinary email came from my office. We are going through a major remodel at work, and we are updating our webpage at the same time. Our personal bios...

Remembered

Today marks 29 months since my dear son, Andy, died. Every day of those 29 months, I have remembered him and missed him. Every day going forward until my last day on earth, I will remember him and miss him. As time moves on, other people forget about Andy and those...

Stony Lake

Two years ago, when my son, Andy, was killed in a car accident, my whole life felt like it was over. The road back to find a little bit of joy again has been long and hard. There are twists and turns, and sometimes it even feels like I am moving backward. Regaining...

Recent Podcast

 

Episode 77: Andy’s Mom & Charleigh’s Grandma

I felt an instant connection to today's guest, Maureen. The most obvious reason for this is that our sons share a name, Andy, and that they were both killed suddenly in tragic car accidents. Another similarity is due to the fact that this was not the first death loss...

Episode 76: TJ’s Mom and Brother

Mental illness and alcoholism often go hand in hand. When people struggle with depression and anxiety, turning to drugs or alcohol may seem like a short-term solution. They can forget about their problems for just a little while. TJ struggled with mental illness...

Episode 75: Grief and Guilt

As a working mom, I think I felt some type of guilt almost every day. I never felt like I was doing enough. I would feel guilty about not spending enough time with my kids, missing school parties, or not being able to volunteer as much as some other moms. In addition...

Email me at marcy@andysmom.com to be on the show, if you'd like me to speak at an event or if you just want to share your story. I love to hear stories of beloved children everywhere.